US: Swapping Gold For Bitcoin 🏅

Gm Timekeepers! ⏳💥

Welcome back to The 13th Hour — your clock-striking, memecoin-driven newsletter where we dig into crypto’s wildest moments, the latest trades, and what’s next in the market chaos.

From gold flipping into Bitcoin to Trump’s latest degen moves, if it’s shaking up the world of crypto, we’re here to break it down.

Grab your watches and stay sharp. This isn’t just market news; it’s the culture of crypto unfolding in real time.

Ready to make sense of today’s madness? Let’s dive in! 🕛🚀

1️⃣ US might sell gold to stack BTC! Trump wants to go full gigachad on-chain 🚀

2️⃣ Tariff exemptions = tech and crypto markets mooning 🌕

3️⃣ Trump’s $1B crypto portfolio is getting serious with DeFi, mining & a stablecoin 🤯

4️⃣ SEC & Binance delay legal drama again. Roundtables over rumble 🤝

5️⃣ Memecoins x Trading Cards = Is Telegram the next meme arena? 💥

🤯 Trump Wants to Buy Bitcoin with Gold?! The US Gov About to Go Full Degen Mode

Imagine telling someone in 2010 that one day the US government might sell gold to buy Bitcoin.

That sounds like a plot twist from bad crypto fan fiction, right? Well... it's 2025, and reality is stranger than fiction.

While BTC is chilling around $85K, a senior White House official just casually dropped that the Trump administration is considering using America's gold stash to shop for Bitcoin. 

Yes, you read that right – GOLD ➡️ BTC.

The plan 👉️ Use gains from U.S. gold reserves to buy Bitcoin “budget-neutrally” (because, you know, responsible degening 😅). 

Bo Hines, the White House’s new crypto hype man (official title: Executive Director of the President's Council Of Advisers on Digital Assets… ‘catchy’), confirmed this spicy alpha on the Crypto in America podcast.

Oh, and let’s not forget the Bitcoin Act 2025 (proposed by Senator Cynthia Lummis) that’d buy 1 MILLION BTC (aka ~5% of the total supply). Talk about a power move!

Meanwhile, Trump is out here declaring he’ll make the US the “undisputed Bitcoin superpower”. Somewhere, Satoshi is either crying tears of joy or laughing uncontrollably.

Retail traders have been yawning through March while BTC sat pretty at $85K. But if Uncle Sam starts stacking sats with gold bars, things could escalate quickly.

Analysts already expect BTC to smash $125K by 2025. 

Throw in some state-level FOMO and… let’s just say $85K might look like a Black Friday deal in hindsight.

Smart money’s watching $75K as the strong support zone. If the U.S. goes bullish, that floor might turn into a trampoline.

📍 Eyes on BTC $85K zone—watch for breakout on policy news

💸 Buy dips near $75K—strong support, stronger government FOMO

📈 Trump going degen = potential long-term macro bullish thesis

🔮 Gold flipping into Bitcoin bags? That's your top signal AND your meme content for the year

📱 Trump Saves iPhones & Bitcoin Boosts? Tech Bros Celebrate While Bond Yields Cry

Just when you thought the tariff drama couldn’t get spicier, Trump pulls a plot twist worthy of a Netflix finale — sparing smartphones, semiconductors, and other tech goodies from his beloved tariffs. 

The result? Tech stocks breathed a sigh of relief, and Bitcoin surged by 9%, too. Yes, seriously. 😮📈

According to the US Customs and Border Protection, Uncle Sam is giving a free pass to chips, modems, storage cards, and other electronics. 

Basically, anything that keeps your favorite gadgets (and your crypto mining rigs 👀) running smoothly.

The Kobeissi Letter chimed in with a mic-drop:

“Large-cap tech companies will ultimately come out ahead.”

And they’re not wrong.

BTC broke $85K on April 12th, right after the announcement. “No more tariffs? Bet.” 😎

Here’s where it gets juicy for crypto:

Tech stocks are back in the green.Risk-on appetite returns.Bitcoin and Ethereum are vibing like it’s 2021 again.S&P 500 also rallied 10%… because why not.

And all this while 10-year US bond yields spiked to 4.5%, signaling investors still don’t trust the long-term game.

Max Keiser (aka Bitcoin’s hype priest) isn’t buying the peace treaty either: Tariff exemptions won’t fix the bond market. The erosion of confidence in the USD is baked in.

So yeah, while the Fed prays for soft landings and bond yields act up like your ex during Mercury retrograde, crypto just might be the unbothered main character.

🟢 Bullish on tech = Bullish on crypto

💻 Less tariff drama = more chips, more rigs, better on-chain scaling

🧠 Macroeconomic chaos = BTC narrative strengthens as an alt-store of value

📉 Watch those bond yields — higher rates = more volatility = opportunity

🚨 From ‘Bitcoin is a Scam’ to ‘King of Crypto’? Trump’s $1B Blockchain Bonanza

Remember when Donald Trump said Bitcoin “should be regulated very, very high”? 😂 Fast forward to 2025 and bam! — he's knee-deep in NFTs, memecoins, DeFi, Bitcoin mining, and even plotting to drop a stablecoin. 

Yes, that Trump.

With nearly $1 billion in paper gains 🤯, Trump & Co. are not just dabbling — they're taking over every corner of the crypto industry like it’s their new Mar-a-Lago. 

From launching the World Liberty Financial DeFi project to cozying up with the Bitcoin mining firm Hut 8, the Trump fam is assembling an Avengers-level squad in Web3.

And oh, let’s not forget Melania’s memecoin, which nosedived 90%

But hey, the vibes were immaculate.

So what’s the game plan?

A stablecoin backed by U.S. Treasuries.A Truth.Fi ETF.Trump NFTs in superhero costumes (yes, again).And Barron Trump as a Web3 Advisor (because why not?).

Crypto insiders are side-eyeing all the “coincidences” — regulatory talks magically lining up with family investments? 🧐 Meanwhile, Trump’s supporters are eating it up like it’s a steak dinner at Mar-a-Lago.

Feeling bullish or calling BS?

Whatever your take, one thing’s clear:

Crypto has officially entered its reality TV phase. 🎬💰

💤 SEC & Binance Hit Snooze Button AGAIN – Is Crypto’s Longest Legal Soap Opera Ever Gonna End?!

SEC vs Binance is back… in court? Nope. They’ve filed for ANOTHER 60-day pause in their eternal legal battle.

Apparently, nothing screams productivity like doing absolutely nothing (in public) while “talking things out.” 🫠📄

This isn’t the first time.

The first pause came in February.

Now, they’re asking Judge Amy Berman Jackson to bless their little ceasefire again until mid-June. Why?

"Productive discussions." Translation: “We’re negotiating behind the scenes, pls no more headlines.” 🙃

Why should you care?

✅ If you’re a trader: Enjoy another 60 days of semi-regulatory peace before the next legal drama drop.

✅ If you’re a founder: This might hint at friendlier future regulations.

✅ If you’re a Binance user: Congrats, your favorite exchange remains slightly less legally uncertain... for now.

✅ If you're just here for courtroom tea: Sorry, the kettle’s on low heat 'til June ☕️

The SEC’s new Crypto Task Force, led by Hester “Crypto Mom” Peirce, is now holding roundtables to figure out “how not to kill innovation.”

Shocking development: they want to talk before regulating. 🧘‍♀️

🤯 Telegram’s New Trading Card Game Will Blow Your Mind

GAMEE, the wild child of Animoca Brands (yes, the same web3 powerhouse), just launched Moon Cards — a first-of-its-kind trading card game (TCG) on Telegram that fuses your favorite memecoins with market-driven gameplay.

Think Pokémon met WallStreetBets and had a baby raised by Degen Twitter. Yep, it’s that chaotic. And brilliant. 🌕

150+ Moon Cards based on real-world memecoins from Solana, TON, and Ethereum are here to spice up your DMs. Telegram isn’t just for alpha leaks anymore—it’s your new meme battleground.

Why just lose money trading memecoins when you can lose friends in PvP battles instead? 😉

Each Moon Card comes with a Star Value and Card Score that updates daily based on:

💸 Price movements📈 Market volatility📣 Social media hype

This isn’t just a game—it’s a live, breathing meme market simulator where your deck’s power shifts with the crypto winds. Better learn how to read those meme charts, fren.

Let’s break it down. Moon Cards will roll out in four spicy phases:

🌑 Moonrise (Live Now!) – Collect, merge, and pray to the meme gods.🤖 Meme Wars – PvE arena battles against AI meme bosses. It’s you vs. the bots.🥷 Degen Showdown – PvP tournaments where market instincts = battlefield dominance.💰 Lunar Marketplace – Trade cards as NFTs. It’s like OpenSea but with more memes and fewer rugs (we hope).

Wanna join the madness? It’s invite-only (obviously—alpha vibes only). But you can:

👉 Join @mooncardsgame🙋‍♀️ Ask for an invite in @mooncardschat🐦 Follow them on X (Twitter)

And for the lucky 230,000 who joined the pre-sale—you’re now the gatekeepers of Moon Cards clout. Invite your frens, stack those free packs, and flex hard. 💪

…and time 🕛

From gold-to-Bitcoin swaps to Moon Card battles on Telegram, crypto’s no longer just a market — it’s a cultural phenomenon.

Whether the U.S. truly apes in or Trump just farms engagement, the game is changing. Keep your charts close and your memes closer—things are about to get weird(er).

Stay alert. See you tomorrow⏳

– Your daily chronographer 🔁